100 Greatest Hard Rock Songs: 40-21

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40. Talk Dirty to Me-Poison: Completely throwing a bone at Bret Michaels, since he hosted this show and he earns VH1 plenty of viewers by boning skanks on the Rock of Love.

39. More Than a Feeling-Boston: I wouldn’t consider this a hard rock song. It’s not hard. I don’t care how many guitar tracks Tom Scholz created for it. This song kind of has a new element of sadness to it since their singer turned out to be a pretty unhappy guy, who took his own life a couple years back.

38. Stone Cold Crazy-Queen: Love this song. Queen proved that they had as much balls as Zeppelin or Sabbath with this song. Classic.





37. My Generation-The Who: I think the Who is the most overrated band ever, other than the Eagles. With that said, their earlier stuff was pretty fucking good, and the line “Hope I die before I get old” signaled a new guard in rock music, and stripped rock of its innocence, along with Bob Dylan and the Beatles experimenting with music (and drugs).

36. Hot for Teacher-Van Halen: I’ve been on an “anti-Van Halen” kick, since they reunited w/ David Lee Roth and giving their longtime bassist, Michael Anthony, the boot. Eddie Van Halen is an arrogant piece of shit, and overrated. However, this song kicks ass, and I still crank it every now and then, as it’s one of their radio workhorses that I’m not entirely sick of. And what school did David Lee Roth go to that had all these ‘hot’ teachers? I’ve never been “hot for teacher” I think ever.



35. School's Out-Alice Cooper: Alice Cooper deserves to be on any hard rock list. My pick would have been “I’m Eighteen.”

34. Barracuda-Heart: Another one of those bands that my dad listened to 24/7 that I never want to hear again. This song’s one of the few songs by Heart I can stomach, probably because it rocks.

33. Basket Case-Green Day: Besides Nirvana, Green Day was my band from when I was 9 or 10. They suck now, but I enjoy spinnin’ Dookie every now & then.

32. Cat Scratch Fever-Ted Nugent: Say what you want about the Nuge; right-wing loudmouth, sexist, asshole, pro-NRA, anti-even drinking a beer every now & again (but bone underage chicks and have a few baby mamas across the planet; that‘s fine). Indeed he is. But I can’t help but like “Cat Scratch Fever.” The only decent riff the Nuge squirted out, amongst gallons of semen on underage groupies.

31. Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap-AC/DC: I think “TNT” or “Highway To Hell” would have represented the Bon Scott years better than this song, but this song ain’t bad either.

30. Even Flow-Pearl Jam: Ya know, I just don’t like Pearl Jam too much anymore. And, they have better songs than “Even Flow.”

29. Bad Reputation-Joan Jett and the Blackhearts: No arguments against this song. Joan Jett has more attitude than most dudes on this list. Plus, she’s sexy as hell.

28. Everlong-Foo Fighters: Dave Grohl proved his worth as a songwriter with “Everlong.” I often say that this was one of the few things that made the end of Nirvana kind of worth it. I always loved the riff.

27. Still of the Night-Whitesnake: HA! Whitesnake. What a fuckin’ joke.

26. Freebird-Lynyrd Skynyrd: If hating Lynyrd Skynyrd and “Freebird” is considered “un-American” (as one blogger wrote), then I’m on board with al-Qaeda.

25. Blitzkrieg Bop-Ramones: Should be way higher, for most of the band that came after the Ramones (and bands on this list) would not exist. I fucking LOVE the Ramones, and still can’t believe that 3 of Da Brudders are gone. Sad story behind the band too.



24. In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida-Iron Butterfly: Great riff, but did the song REALLY need to be 17 minutes long?

23. Crazy Train-Ozzy Osbourne: After he left Black Sabbath, I don’t really care about Ozzy…. Except for this song, and maybe 3 or 4 others. Even then, Sabbath stopped making good records after 1974.

22. Hey Joe-Jimi Hendrix Experience: OK, why isn’t this song in the Top 10? And why “Hey Joe?” Why not “Purple Haze?” People are stupid. Not that I’m slamming “Hey Joe.”

21. Kashmir-Led Zeppelin: Zeppelin’s crowning achievement, in my honest opinion. This song is fucking fantastic, and should be higher than #21 (especially since the song that came at #20 flat out blows and is unworthy in the face of “Kashmir”)